The Shadow on the Road of the Initiation

"A bit of advice
Given to a young Native American
At the time of his initiation:
As you go the way of life,
You will see a great chasm. Jump.
It is not as wide as you think." Joseph Campbell

          I recently bought the book, The Integral Life Practice.  I went straight to the Shadow chapter.  Their definition and process of teaching how to deal with your shadow led be to an examination of the last 6 months.  Between my own research on the initiation process of heroes, since I am an avid Joseph Campbell follower, I have found that my path is starting to match that of the initiation process of many of our ancient cultures but with a modern theme.  Joseph Campbell advocates that the heroes journey is a separation, imitation and return.  After his immense study of different cultural  archetypes he advocated that the modern human must continue the process of the hero path without the tribal and or ancient rituals and rites of passage.  While he did not give specific steps, the Integral Life Practice does give me a step by step process to follow.  TILP helps you understand each mode of emotional level- authentic vs. inauthentic.  I have only just begun.  While this piece is on a mixture of psychology and mythic symbolism it all helps in the discovery of unconscious tendencies that need to be addressed. 

          Joseph Campbell  promoted the idea that we are modern sages out in a field and we need a new mythology, and our only guide is the collective unconscious.  The collective unconscious will be tapped by humans through their dreams, as the psychoanalysis has discovered during the therapy sessions.  So as I understand the old rituals and rites of passage for different phases of ones life, I realized I was that person without a direction, even though I was entering a new phase of my life.  Where do I turn?  Where are my guides?  Will anyone give me some sort of ceremony, some catharsis anything that will speak to my unconscious.  Joseph Campbell said that the symbols found in our ancient myths speak to our unconscious.  If there is no bridge between conscious life and unconscious life we are in big trouble.  I wasn't about to go down the depression road or get lost in the wasteland.  I had to create my own rituals, find my own neurosis and go on a rites of passage of my own making.  It is not smooth and I didn't have any ceremony or group to witness my shift, for I dwell in the modern wasteland of Commercial/materialism.  This is a monster that needs to be fought everyday, but I choose to fight a different battle, one of moving on.  This is my story. 

"Clearly, mythology is no toy for children. Nor is it a matter of archaic, merely scholarly concern, of no moment to modern men of action. For its symbols (whether in the tangible form of images or in the abstract form of ideas) touch and release the deepest centers of motivation, moving literate and illiterate alike, moving mobs, moving civilizations."
— Joseph Campbell (Primitive Mythology)

         

          There is no denying that some deep shift is happening to our world and my personal world.   I could feel lost if I let the society's empty hand describe my current position.  I cling to mythology , psychology and my own intuitive nature to guide me in the wasteland that stretches out before me.  I am going through a divorce.  I am working as a devoted school teacher who only finds that the brokenness is an endless sea of dysfunction.  I am trying to make up my own initiation into the coming shift that I feel the world is going through. 

          The reason I believe in the shift is because all of my male relatives have vanished from me in the last ten years with my husband being the last one.  And he might have been one of my greatest teachers but someone I could no longer struggle against.  My first three iconic male relations were like The Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost.  My grandfather was the ultimate heroic father figure, not just to me but to all of his children and their spouses.  He wasn't about intellect or words, but actions that reflected freedom, forgiveness and adventure.  My brother is the one who was equal and a modern day broken Buddha.  We have the same spirit split in two.  He and I went on the adventures with full hearts that opened wide .  He recently married and now does know my name.  I have released him from my emotional body- it was a tearing of my heart but I have let it go.  My father passed on six years ago.  He was my holy spirit, teaching all the sensitive things about my soul and forgave me.  Him and I were the same as far as our spiritual nature. 

          Between death, old age and just a different lifestyle all of the men I loved and or love dearly are no longer in my life.  My husband is the last one who could not grow spiritually or mentally and so I ended this relationship recently. 

          I do not feel secure.  I am out in a field that has no sign posts or markers for me to reach for.  I decided that I would make my own initiation.   I will make my own markers so to guide me onward.  If I did not embark and or mark my way I would fall too deeply into the vast sea of depression and or inauthentic existence. 

          I was laid off for the second time in the school district I work for.  My husband and my business closed down.  My husband left to go find another job in Mexico, which is somewhere I did not want to live.  It seemed as if I was entering the forest of despair.  The only light was that my mother came to live with me the previous month before all this happened.  I began to exercise and try to focus on things I could control. 

          I read the books The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo.  This book was paramount in my path.  It was like a lighthouse that was a beacon.  The author was male and made it a point to research ancient female warriors and their tribes.  Most of them were warriors of the most fierce kind.

"An estimated 600 women served during the American Civil War.  They had signed up disguised as men.  ....Historians have often struggles to deal with women who do not respect gender distinctions, and nowhere is that distinction more sharply drawn than in the question of armed combat.... But from antiquity to modern times, there are many stories of female warriors, of Amazons."  Stieg Larsson Pg 3- The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest.

During the summer I began going on hikes in the mountains that was led by women.  There was at least four to five always climbing mountains.  This sank down into my psyche, like my unconscious was a hunter of all things feminine, like a parched survivor of the desert.  These books and involvement with women were oasis in dunes of desolation. 

         Life has a way of meeting you half way.  As I began my job the feeling of security starts to return with my young- adults- they are pure of heart and open for life to greet them.  This beauty that presented itself in Southside-ghetto classroom was my first saving grace.  I had beautiful souls in front of me and their fullness for life was infectious.  As I began again to teach I began to make friends which I had not done throughout my marriage.  Three females came into my life.  Did the three females replace my three males, I do not know.  All highly feminine and intelligent.  Two women who are partners and one married.  My mother was another foundation that came into my life before the crisis hit me, and remains as she always has, a rock of guidance.  So I have four females. 

The three women who manifested themselves like good witches before me reminded me of the triple goddess... virgin, maiden, crone, and or the three fates. 

"...triple moon is a Goddess symbol that represents the Maiden, Mother, and Crone as the waxing, full, and waning moon. It is also associated with feminine energy, mystery and psychic abilities.

The Maiden represents enchantment, inception, expansion, the female principle, the promise of new beginnings, youth, excitement, and a carefree erotic aura. The Maiden in Greek Mythology is Persephone - purity - and a representation of new beginnings. Other maiden goddesses include: Brigid, Nimue, among others.

The Mother represents ripeness, fertility, fulfillment, stability, and power. The Mother Goddess in Greek mythology is Demeter, representing wellspring of life, giving and compassionate. Other mother goddesses include: Aa, Ambika, Ceres, Astarte, Lakshmi.

The Crone represents wisdom, repose, and compassion. The Crone in Greek mythology is Hecate - wise, knowing, a culmination of a lifetime of experience. Crone goddesses include: Hel, Maman Brigitte, Oya, Sedna, Skuld, and others. " Ellie Crystal (http://www.crystalinks.com/triplegoddess.html)

Shadow and Anima or Animus

The shadow and anima or animus are Jungian's idealogy and all are found in the unconscous part of the psyche.  They are usually hidden to a person.  The heroic journey is sometimes just a metaphor for the journey down into your own inner world.  Here is an explanation of the parts of the unconscious. 

Erich Neumann, The Origins and History of Consciousness (Princeton University Press, 1954) xxii n. 7:

"It is in this sense that we use the terms "masculine" and "feminine" throughout the book, not as personal sex-linked characteristics, but as symbolic expressions. . . . The symbolism of "masculine" and "feminine" is archetypal and therefore transpersonal; in the various cultures concerned, it is erroneously projected upon persons as though they carried its qualities. In reality every individual is a psychological hybrid. . . . . [I]t is one of the complications of individual psychology that in all cultures the integrity of the personality is violated when it is identified with either the masculine or the feminine side of the symbolic principle of opposites."

"The Anima is the personification of all feminine psychological tendencies within a man, the archetypal feminine symbolism within a man's unconscious. The Animus is the personification of all masculine psychological tendencies within a woman, the archetypal masculine symbolism within a woman's unconscious."  (http://www2.cnr.edu/home/bmcmanus/anima.html) 

          I felt the tide shifting within.   If the unconscious was a sea beneath and my self was at the mercy of dark waves growing larger, I had to do something to break these waves, to address the unknown.   I began a friendship with an old flame male friend, but I later find that this friendship is really only my unconscious projected onto a male friend.  I had found my shadow.  I did not know this at the time but it was a golden/monster shadow experience.  It was long distance correspondence, non-threatening, not based on reality really.  Yet what it accomplished was my new found talent of writing in the virtual world was verified by him.  My feelings for another man and the possibility of another encounter with the opposite sex was blooming.  I had become so not myself in my marriage.  I had lost my way.  I was growing and shifting and my husband was not with me in my new found land. 

 I asked him first to be my priest, I needed the confessor.  If I followed what Christ did, he mediated, then came forth to teach his fellow men what he knew.  Yet also he was being anointed, baptized and finally crucified.  All these experience are part of the initiations that are required to shift your consciousness.  The initiation requires certain physical rituals.  I only voiced my beliefs, faults and things that I wanted to leave in the past, for there was no other ritual to go through. 

          So as my energy grew through the active shadow, I became exited and sort of obsessive.  I decided to travel to him, which in retrospect was on the edge of insane.  This is the energy that motivates you from the unconscious.  My shadow was in full gear and the projection was of my Animus who was projecting those things that I was attracted to in the old friend.  A female has male qualities inside her, usually repressed into the unconscious realm.  So when she meets a man, she will if she is unaware of her unconscious tendencies project her hidden qualities onto the man.  For example,  my old flame was a writer, musician, father and very spiritual.  All these qualities attracted me immensely to him.  My excitement was from my shadow energy. 

                He was 2000 miles away.  I did not actually have a physical meeting with him until Christmas time and it was two days only.  I had a virtual relationship with him for three months prior to actual physical meeting.  This was all just my projection energy bouncing off of an idea of a man.  It was very false, yet it served a purpose.  My focus was not on my husband, it was now on a man who embraced the same ideals, talents and spiritual nature that I felt were important.  Did I fall into his arms and spin a dysfunctional relationship? No, I did not.  I read my life as a metaphor.  I originally asked him to be my spiritual mentor and he was, even if I brought my shadow up and used the energy that was hidden.  I brought my repressed animus up at our of my unconscious and used this energy to move myself on. 

                   I requested that my old friend go on a initiation with me, but it was all done jokingly yet I knew things had to be done for me.  I got a tattoo in November when the path was going into the darkest night.  It is a triangle-a representation of the male with the point facing up.  It has a Keltic knot inside that represents eternal circle.  It seems silly but in tribal times when shamans or warriors go on a vision quest they would mark each other according to your spiritual journey. 

            I did not go on a Walk About, nor a Vision Quest, but I did travel across the US to do something.  At the time I was playing the society superficial card.   I fell back into society's falseness with expectations of sex and romantic ideas.  This was my monster shadow rearing its misguided head.  The energy was miraculous.  The energy of the shadow is no small amount.  I projected so much onto my old male friend I could of flew to the moon.  My pulse, my feeling were in overdrive.  I was looking at myself in the mirror, and finding myself attractive again.  I was fantasizing about our meeting.  While it was a frenzy of energy no harm came to me, but I was lucky that the gentleman I chose was pure of heart.  I could of been in danger if I chose to focus on a different kind of man.  This is why one should take seriously their unconscious tendencies. 

          When I arrived it was like meeting a priest.  He was gentle, welcoming, excited and pure.  Not one move was made sexually.  He listened to me.  It might have been the most beautiful moment- a psychological anointment- there was no oil, but there was sincerity- and I do not care if it was my own projection.  We enjoyed ourselves, confessed some issues that hurt us.  We flirted a little.  The only thing that was missing is that he did not dip me in water and say I was redeemed, yet I felt it.  He was my mirror.  I found a sensitive beautiful, father(he has 5 children) who let me project my hidden dark areas - both negative and golden-both heavy with energy that needed release. He is a musician, good writer and adventuresome in nature. Just as broken as me, but somehow making our way out of the ashes.  I was looking at myself when we met. 

          When I returned home from my adventure, I sank back into myself, but I felt good and not in a frantic frenzy over this man.  So what had happened.  It was not until I started looking at what the shadow does in your life that I realized what I had done.  I do not feel lonely.  This whole episode was not arrange.  I wanted to have some sort of inititation, something planned and meaningful.  What happens now in modern times is this sort of dysfunctional piecing together of rituals.  Making your own markers and confrontin your neurosis is done alone, in silence and seems silly to the average person.  Am I making something out of nothing?  Maybe but it is all I have.  I will continue to pursue this line of reasoning and searching until this modern world shifts or makes up a new mythology that speaks to our soul and helps us to move on through each phase of life.  Life will not change, and be less sorrowful or challenging. 

          Jung says there is the persona, ego, shadow and anima or animus and self.  When people want to work on themselves they hardly penetrate the shadow and must need guidance to meet the animus head on.  I am not sure myself, but going down inside is no small venture.  I have met my shadow, and as the book Integral Life Practice shows writing in a journal and doing their recommended exercises will help you merge this part of you self into a more manageable and or healthy awareness.  I have a lot waking up, work, and or merging of all parts of my mind, body and soul to do.  The Integral Life Practice is a practical road map to go forth into the dangerous abyss.  My mystical helpers are the literature, art and beauty of the people who surround me.  The modern hero seems evolved beyond the ancient heroes, but we really face the same monsters.  Pick up a sword and a shield and instead of falling -pierce the energies that lie deep within they will save you in the end. 

The Grail Quest is Your Quest

William Morris, Vision of the Holy Grail, 1890
www.mcgoodwin.net/pages/otherbooks/we_parzival.html

"The Grail Hero- particularly in the person of Parzival, the "Great Fool" is the forthright, simple, uncorrupted, noble son of nature, without guile, strong in the purity of the yearning of his heart..... in the end, as in the case of Parzival, the guide within will be his own noble heart alone, and the guide without, the image of beauty, the radiance of divinity, that wakes in his heart amor: the deepest, inmost seed of his nature, consubstantial with the process of the All, "thus come." And in this life-creative adventure the criterion of achievement will be... the courage to let go the past, with its truths, its goals, its dogmas of "meaning" and its gifts: to die to the world and come to birth from within." Joseph Campbell

The Holy Grail represents the human pursuing their highest spiritual attainment. This is a very western story. The Holy Grail is only the end boon, but it is the journey to this place and or state that finally the grail will reveal itself. It will not be clear to the hero until the hero attains the right state of mind and soul. The Grail is not a factual or physical thing, but a representation of the ultimate spiritual attainment. It would be similar to Nirvana in the East.
The spiritual quest is one where the individual's talent is important. This is opposite of the Eastern view of spiritual enlightenment. In the East the Buddha or guru all follow the same type of path to attain Nirvana, and to extinguishing the ego completely is the goal. There is a problem with this in the west since from the minute we are born our ego is promoted- shaped by our wants, talents and desires. In the East the ego is only there for a small measure because your path is so set out for you. You must marry, get a career, raise children. They do not push you to develop your talents like we do in the west. So when the western person goes to an Eastern guru we really have a hard time going into that space were we must get rid of the giant ego that has been at the center of our life since we can remember. Many would say this is bad but it is not it is only a different approach. What is the bad thing is misunderstanding our western mythology, which is mostly the story of Christ. He is our Buddha, but he is so above us and so chosen as in factual incarnation of god's only son we have become lost. The Christ story is so literal that we can not understand it on a metaphorical level that speaks to our inner yearning. Since the church as stated he is "The Son of God" and there is no other then his journey is not one we can pursue. This story must be approached differently and can be a guide if you get a different interpretation.
The Grail or Twelfth century stories are another approach to the spiritual quest of the western man. The nature is similar to the Buddha's issues of overcoming attachment to this and that, which distracts you from your spiritual nature. Compassion is the key also to your approach to your inner wisdom. The Grail quest begins with each night entering the forest on his own and where there is no path ever trodden upon. This is how western man must approach his spiritual quest. We are unique and it is up to us to find that talent and the thing that speaks to us, that erases the ego eventually and leads us to our center and where bliss takes over. Now your never going to get rid of that Giant Ego but you will know how to go to your center, or the creative place so that bliss and joy flows through you and you can deal with the sorrowful life that will greet you at every turn. We can not get rid of the sorrow because time means things decay and eventually die. So what shall we do in the in between? The struggle or initiation is seeking your path, the path that is uniquely yours. What tool do we use on this quest? Compassion with ourselves and others will be the first centering component, then courage and persistence. It will not be easy. The reason it will not be easy is because we have so many people saying " you should and you shan't" so you must throw off what society says you must do. If you are traveling down the path that your father or mother laid out for you, you are on the wrong path. This is hard because their is a whole lot of society, especially media, spinning a picture of what you should do. To ignore the TV alone is a heroic accomplishment in itself. To not focus on money every single minute of the day is another heroic accomplishment. And you are on your way.
"In the grail legends, the land of people doing what they think they ought to do or have to do is the wasteland. What is the wasteland to you? I know damned well what the wasteland would be to me: the academic approach to my material; or a marriage to someone who had no thoughts or feelings for me or my work. Living with such a person would be the wasteland." Joseph Campbell.
The initiation- the task is to become individuated. Jung says this about an individuated person. " ... to live as a released individual, one has to know how and when to put on and to put off the masks of one's various life roles.... The aim of individuation requires that one should find and then learn to live out of one's own center, in control of one's for and against. And this cannot be achieved by enacting and responding to any general masquerade of fixed roles."
It is a constant quest toward your evolvement here on Earth. It is not a two week course or a 12 step program. If you think of the discipline a knight had to go through and all of his attributes; honor, courage, courtesy, compassion, loyalty and more, these give you tools to travel along the path. The journey becomes one of inner seeking and believing deeply that you are worthy of such a journey. The compassion must be applied to yourself and for many this will be the most difficult task. To believe one hundred percent that you deserve to have joy, pursue your dream and live in bliss daily. So get your Parzival shoes on and enter the darkest spot of the forest where the vines are so think there is no way to get through, yet you pull your sword out and cut through because you know deep in your heart you will find the Holy Grail. You were made for this quest.

Going Inside- The Hero Within

"One thing that comes out in myths is that at the bottom of the abyss comes the voice of salvation. The black moment is the moment when the real message of transformation is going to come. At the darkest moment comes the light." Joseph Campbell, Power of Myth


How does mythology relate to the individual. The individual has a inner life and internal dynamic that must be aligned if they are to feel peaceful and powerful in their life. The power is not over someone else, but it pertains to being empowered as an individual existing in a social context. In our modern society shifting your attention to the inner life and what is happening within you seems to be for the eccentric and not the masses. The inner life sometimes scares people or they do not want to listen to their neurosis and or conflicting wants and desires. But as we ignore what appears to be negative parts of ourselves we also ignore our immense mystery and light. What mythology does is give you a road map to your inner energies because we have the positive and negative forces within us engaged in a battle. If we don't have symbols or mythology that act as our map then we are lost and thus we are always at the mercy of energies that do not have a name or value.
According to Joseph Campbell from his book Power of Myth, in India around the ninth century B.C the Upanishads explain that all gods are within you. Heaven and Hell are all manifestations that come from our inner battles. They are only metaphors for the opposite energies that are within every single human being on Earth from past to present. Gods represent energies from the ground of being. We have a source of life and it manifests as opposites in the world of time. This seems to devalue the god in religion but all it does is say that it is not literal devil or father god. This does not mean you can not raise your consciousness either. The experience of the mystery is still valuable and real. To transcend the world of opposites and find the eternal is possible and real. As you go deeper into some religions and analysis, many people have said that god cannot be described. To describe or name is to miss the point. Concepts and thought of humans cannot explain what is beyond thought, therefore the source or eternal cannot be named or explained. "The best things can't be told because they go beyond thought. Then the second mistake we make is to try to explain it and then it is all misunderstood. That is when we try to describe god we mess it up. The third thing we do is put it into story and use symbols which is also mythological images." Joseph Campbell.

The initiation into the mystery, your own inner mystery is you going deeper into the dynamic of your source. When you enter the forest-the dark parts of yourself- you meet your fears and face them. You find that you have qualities both male and female. You begin to understand that you are both, you have what it takes to empower and overcome the difficult things in your life. You understand that you are all things, you have everything to fight the battle of life. And you begin to feel fulfilled, whole because you start to identify with the world beyond opposites, you understand that beyond time there is eternity and you were born from this. The poet Blake says this "Eternity is in love with the productions of time!" Eternity poured into the field of time, of limitation, of opposites. Why? Our creation myths show us some possibilities. Here is one short one.

"Before all time, there was a deity who said, "I am." As soon as it said "I am," it was afraid. It was an entity now, in time. Then it thought, "What should I be afraid of, I'm the only thing that is." And soon as it said that, if felt lonesome, and wished that there were another, and so felt desire. It swelled, split in two, became male and female, and begot the world."

These elements are the elementary energies we must deal with in our everyday life. We must struggle with our fears, loneliness, desires and move in the field of time. All of our gods and devils are manifestations and symbols for these elements. To say one god is better than the other, or that one people are chosen over another is to miss the point of religion and its message. If we focused on our inner lives and understood the desires and fears then we would become more aware and learn how to be at peace. To understand what we are is to move past or transcend the world of opposites into the eternal. The world of radiance waits for all to see it. When you can look past the things in front of you, start to see the road map, the symbols that speak to you and transform your fear and desires, then you will have transformed your inner self into something more complete. Yes you will still be in Time but you will know and experience the eternal within Time.

The Shadow and the Purpose of Initiation

Even if we think we are not on the Road of Trials- the Initiation stage is Joseph Campbell's second stage of the hero's journey, we are. In our modern technological society it seems as we are floating along with our three-bedroom house, our two car garage, and 9 to 5 job, but our inner life needs to be addressed also. Our lives seems civilized and without serious issues. The thing we don't see is our shadow, our night slumbering that reveals our unconscious desires and problems. We cannot hide from these unconscious tendecies. The shadow unattended becomes manifestated as addictions, abuse to others, constant failure of some part of our lives. It seems as if the masses are semi-lost all of the time. This is why it is important to explore our mythology or religion and figure out if the stories and lessons are fitting our everyday experiences. If they are not it means our conscious self and unconscious self are separated.

"It is a frightening thought that man also has a shadow side to him, consisting not just of little weaknesses- and foibles, but of a positively demonic dynamism. The individual seldom knows anything of this; to him, as an individual, it is incredible that he should ever in any circumstances go beyond himself. But let these harmless creatures form a mass, and there emerges a raging monster; and each individual is only one tiny cell in the monster's body, so that for better or worse he must accompany it on its bloody rampages and even assist it to the utmost. Having a dark suspicion of these grim possibilities, man turns a blind eye to the shadow-side of human nature. Blindly he strives against the salutary dogma of original sin, which is yet so prodigiously true. Yes, he even hesitates to admit the conflict of which he is so painfully aware." Carl Jung
On the Psychology of the Unconscious" (1912). In CW 7: Two Essays on Analytical Psychology. P.35

It means our shadow is dangerous, unknown and causes us to hurt ourselves or others. The Road of Trials and or Inititation stage is to go into the dark-the-belly-of-the-whale- and bring forth the dark part into the light. It takes work, discipline and committment. It is like Frodo who has such a strong heart and intergrity that he can carry such a wicked ring. The ring almost kills him in the end. Carrying the wicked dark things around will eventually destroy the light inside you. So we must work with the little devil sitting on our shoulder- we should not opress him because then he comes forth as unknown tendencies. For example, if you are a priest and you deny your sexuality because you like men so you join the church to escape then your tendencies will take control of you and you will engage in unethical actions to release this sexual energy that has been supressed and the victims are usually those with less authority than you.


"If you imagine someone who is brave enough to withdraw all his projections, then you get an individual who is conscious of a pretty thick shadow. Such a man has saddled himself with new problems and conflicts. He has become a serious problem to himself, as he is now unable to say that they do this or that, they are wrong, and they must be fought against. He lives in the "House of the Gathering." Such a man knows that whatever is wrong in the world is in himself, and if he only learns to deal with his own shadow he has done something real for the world. He has succeeded in shouldering at least an infinitesimal part of the gigantic, unsolved social problems of our day." Carl Jung
"Psychology and Religion" (1938). In CW 11: Psychology and Religion: West and East. P.140

Mythology seems a primitive story telling episode but what everyone does realize is that stories are symbols and metaphors for our way of being. We have a psyche and it is a dynamic part of our lives. Stories are told to show and guide us as what to do with our being here on this Earth. In history the dragons and monsters represent the shadow and or negative energy of the the universe. The humans back in the day did not say "oh you have issues with your shadow you better go to your therapist." The humans had a medicine man or shaman who knew on some level that there was some sort of pscyhological issue with one of the tribe members. He did a dance and smoked a pipe and maybe the problem was fixed. The stories would accompany the problem of the tribesman. Some occasions called for serious calling on the spirits. The shamans knew how to have an "experience" that involved some sort of connection to a spirit world that gave guidance as how to treat their person with the illness.

In our modern day society we have measured away all mystery or magic for the facts. The problem arises that our spirit and or unconcious communicates in symbols. The proof of this is humanities dreams. The dreams of the patients match exactly the Greek myths with one eye cyclops down to being chased across some sybmolic bridge. These dreams are telling a story and are obscured from our conscious view because the scienctific community does not find them valueable. The bottom line is that we must bridge the gap between the conscious and unconscious selves. This requires a new mythology or a mixture of old and new.

"And so it happens that if anyone- in whatever society- undertakes for himself the perilous journey into the darkness by descending, either intentionally or unintentionally, into the crooken lanes of his own spiritual labyrinth, he soon finds himself in a landscape of symbolical figures(any of one of which may swallow him)....In the vocabulary of the mystics, this the second stage of the Way, that of the "purification of the self, " when the senses are "concentrated upon transcendental things"; or in a vocabulary of more modern turn this the process of dissolving, transcending, or transmuting the infantile images of our personal past. in our dreams the ageless perils, gargoyles, trials, secret helpers, and instructive figues are nightly still encountered; and in their forms we may see reflected not only the whole picture of our present case, but also the clue to what we must do to be saved." Joseph Campbell, (Hero with a Thousand Faces)

Here in this Lord of the Rings clip Frodo finds out that he is a ring bearer- that he must be the one that carries the dark powerful ring to ultimately destroy it. This is a perfect example of all of us that must carry darkness within us. Do we have what it takes? Yes we do, but it is not easy. As we know Frodo almost dies at the end. So we must seek out the dark parts of our lives. The parts that are unclear must be examined to move the dark into the light and transform ourselves.
http://psikoloji.fisek.com.tr/jung/shadow.htm

The Video "The King of Love is a Deadman"

This collage of movies and ideas points to some obscure path of our modern adventure. Our media selves is evolving fast. This video is saying that the King of Love- Jesus had to die. Death is at the forefront of our culture and minds. Vampires, zombies and violence all seem to be the themes of today. Most of the films in this video have some very deep points. Winnie the Pooh seems to be refering to The Tao of Pooh. East meets west meets transformation. Are we going to the end of an Age? Yes we are. No matter if you are religious are not we are moving at a rapid speed toward something different or big. Aren't we always doing this? I think this time it is different. We seem to be moving more into a feminine and masculine balance.

It is awkward but we are forging ahead nevertheless. Our technology is pushing us to the next level. The internet provides a wealth of information, now it is time for us to be vigorous in our initiation of using information to make our lives valuable. Our Road of Trials is still difficult but it seems as if we are doing something different this time around. We are are an expanding consciousness for sure. Do not forgot that thought has not been here before and this is something to be proud of. Keep your sword of truth close and your heart pure and we will attain the boon together. The hard part is that we must die to the old self. The ego must go and this video is saying death is an essential part of our transformation. Our ego must be destroyed if we are going to the next level of human and spiritual existence. It is not easy and demands discipline. Death is what the saints, saviors, and shamans all had to face to have a real spiritual experience. So let Death sit on your shoulder and consult it daily this is the start of your initiation.

The Initiation of Warriors- The American Veterans of WWII

Saving Private Ryan with Enya singing May It Be

This video is a tribute to all those who have given their lives for the American Way of Life. This is a strange combination of beauty with Enya's voice and the violence of war. I'd like to think the Beauty reflects the grace and love that is beyond our understanding and that one day humanity shall realize it without having to wage war.

"Furthermore, we have not even to risk the adventure alone; for the heroes of all time have one before us, the labyrinth is fully known; we have only to follow the thread of the hero-path. And where we had thought to find an abomination, we shall find a god; where we had thought to slay another, we shall slay ourselves; where we had thought to travel outward, we shall come to the center of our own existence; where we had thought to be alone, we shall be with all the world." — Joseph Campbell (The Hero with a Thousand Faces)



The ultimate initiate is a warrior. We know the great ones by heart, Odysseus, Luke Skywalker, or Jonah. All of them left the familar scene and went out into danger. They left what is known to explore the unknown. Most of the warriors of the military have entered their courageous path out of a sense of duty. An obligation that they feel is required of them to uphold, so as to fight for the values of their community. There is a generation of American men who seem to have such rare gifts that they are able to sit with the legends that proceed them. They are the generation of men who fought in World War II.
There is one man in particular who comes to my mind. My grandfather is a WWII Veteran and he was only a baker but was blown off a ship in the South Pacific just the same. This is his story.

"The Battle of Leyte Gulf, also called the "Battles for Leyte Gulf", and formerly known as the "Second Battle of the Philippine Sea", is generally considered to be the largest naval battle of World War II and also one of the largest naval battles in history.[1](Wikipedia)

In the Navy, Napoleon became Joe Falany and he was on the USS Suwannee CVE 27. On the morning of October 25th, 1944 the battle stations bell rang. They were right in the middle of the Leyte Gulf ready to do their duty.
Joe Falany was just a baker. He kept all the officers and everyone else fed sweets. So this is not a big glorious heroic stereotype. Most underestimate the little jobs of the military during the war. It is more exciting to hear about the great battles and warriors who stood up to fear and won. My grandfather’s position was that of quiet offering of his service in the best way he knew how. A good medicine man provides some spiritual counsel in the form of food. The Navy was a harsh reality. The USS Suwannee was a floating city of men. Who feeds the men? Who supplies men with something resembling home when they have been away from their mother’s or wife’s kitchen for three years. Who will remind them that they are humans gathering together to a feast to celebrate life? It is the cook and baker that use their medicine when they make food for the soldiers everyday. It is the little things that matter when you are traveling around the world on a boat. Our navy didn’t even have the luxury of Italian or Greek food made by beautiful European women like the army did in Europe. Joe Falany was who put a little of his special medicine into the things that he made, and thus the ship and most of the crew survived including himself after two kamikaze aircraft dove into the ship.

So on Oct 25th, 1944 the battle bell rang and all men had to report to their battle stations. The kamikaze hit the USS Suwannee and my grandfather was blown off, and was floating semi-conscious in the SouthSea. His flesh was on fire. Since he was in the salt water it must have helped with his burnt skin. He unconsciously put his arm around a medical can that was sealed and thus stayed afloat. He floated out there for who knows how long. A CVE boat came looking for him eventually. They found him and wrapped him up like a mummy. They hung all the burned survivors on a medical ship, upside down because their flesh smelled so bad. If the burned victims didn't twitch their heads or move their bodies they would throw them over the side. The Japanese hit the medical ship too. So my grandfather was burned and hanging upside down and the ship were on fire too. They finally transferred him to another ship that was going to the burn unit on New Guinea.

In New Guinea my grandfather was treated for his physical problems but that did not help his memory. He could not remember anything of the explosion or who he was. He was officially missing in action. My great grandmother was notified. My soon to be grandmother was writing my grandfather faithfully and he returned her letters before the explosion. They were courting each other through letters. So my grandmother also knew he was MIA. The priest would come daily and ask my grandfather if he remembered anything and he didn't for two weeks or so. Then one day the priest came and did not ask my grandfather directly if he remembered anything. Then everything came flooding back. He wrote my grandmother first and when they received the letter in Boston, my great-grandmother called my other great-grandmother about his location and condition.

The Boon was his story, his survival, and is amazine attitude and grace about the whole ordeal. Did a mysterious tranformation happen as this great man was blown from the ship and was barely alive waiting for rescue. My belief was that some people are meant for heroic destinies- they are simply made for the job. The can handle the trauma and are able to return and bring with them the grace that got them through such horror.

Not one bitter word was uttered by Napoleon “Sudy” Falany about the war. He always told the story with grace and ease. Sometimes when speaking of the kamikaze, he would say “those damn Japanese” and that was it. He moved to California as many of his generation did after the war. He moved to central California and started his own small fence business. He raised four children and his only daughter is my mother.

I was a small little child when my grandfather, Papa Joe, became like a second father to me. He waited for me at airports to take me fishing. We rode horses, went on secret trails to hidden lakes. He waited for me on boats in Central America so that we could live on a Caye near a barrier reef. At eight years old I was snorkeling in the Blue Hole in Central America. He stole me away like Peter Pan stole Wendy, sprinkled me with Tinker-Bell dust and we went flying to Never Never Land every summer of my childhood. I did not know on a conscious level what this did to me. Just like when you take medication that fights an infection, you don’t see it work, but you feel the difference as you heal. Spending so much time near my grandfather as a young child, was like being in a sweat lodge singing the ancient songs of my ancestors. It helped me know what to be aware of in this life. He reminded me what had value without telling me directly, but showing me what life could be. This was medicine so unknown by most. It was the medicine of high adventure.

There was no righteousness behind my grandfather; he had no wisdom in the form of words, except for simple words that all people could understand. “You only pass this way once” He was all about action, and the most adventurous, hard-working-smiling-constantly-building-things-kind of man. He built fishing camps out in the Gulf of Mexico that still stand. He built a log cabin in Stanley, Idaho. He built a long dock out from a Half Moon Key in Belize. Sudy Falany was not a sit- on- the- sidelines kind of man. His sense of adventure never paled, it held such a wide amount of love that it transformed my idea of what life is and or should be. A true hero never stops exploring and or following his bliss- it is a risk, but if you find the confidence the energy that resides in going out into the unknown and saying yes to all you can then the doors will open. I have been the presence of such grace and walked through a door two with a hero in front of me. He is my grandfather and is a man who walked with a light heart through this life. The boon of this man spins out so wide it is like a net of gems- so that one gem reflects the other out into the eternal.

Intitation of Jesus

http://www.freewebs.com/utah_knight/jesus-mary-magdalene.jpg- Stained Glass in the Rennes Le Chateau in France.

"Jesus was an initiate and adept of the ancient Judaic mysteries who strove to reinstate the tradition of the bridechamber sacrament in his time.
The work shows that Jesus sought to establish equity of masculine and feminine in both spiritual practice and social traditions, particularly in the sacrament of marriage.
It reinterprets Jesus’ key teachings in light of the ancient tradition of sacred consortship and reveals what happened to the gnostic heart of Christianity that Jesus embodied.
Jesus was a high-initiate and master adept of the ancient Judaic mysteries who strove to free people from the dead hand of the ritualists. He was trained in a dissident Jewish brotherhood that arose in Egypt before he was born, which sought to bring back the ancient Judaic mysteries outlawed by the Jerusalem temple." Victoria LePage

(http://www.innertraditions.com/Contributor.jmdx;jsessionid=18CBF7F6645F121C617ABAA229EE4F6F?action=displayDetail&id=1575
)

This artilce explores tha idea that maybe Jesus went through an initiation process and Mary Magdalena was essential to Jesus' attainment of Christhood and or moving his consciousness up to the highest possible level here on Earth. Initiation is totally different concept than sacrifice. Initiation is a radical shift from the fate-imposed to the free will human. If the Western world unconsciously views and measures their lives by a man who was initiated rather than sacrifice our whole psychology and experience may change. Initiations assumes that the man has control of his life, he is purposefully moving into a specific discipline to attain experience or knowledge. Since Jesus was alive during the last light of Egypt's power and the Greek civilization the old priest of each of these cultures held a secret initation process that was only for a special few. The masses were not aware of the secret teachings of the priests and philosophers. So for us as Western modern people do we believe the status quo or do we use our new found reason to explore what really happened 2000 years ago. The mystery continues and do not expect the priest to tell you any sort of real truth. The Roman Empire were skilled at manipulating information like no other civilization on Earth even to this day. To manipulate the mind is the ultimate feat- and the book known as the Bible has been used as weapon more than tool to bring grace to others.

First I am assuming that our mythology or great religions influence our attitudes and ultimately later our experience. We have to admit that we are waking up from 2000 years of faith based world view and now we want science and research to be at the forefront of our thinking and perceiving reality. Yet their are undercurrents that still prevail as far as attitudes and unconscious manifestations of an old paradigm. The old paradigm is the wester Judeo Christian worldview. We assume that we had one savior and he was the son of god and he was not married or involved with a female. The Far WEst takes this to be a fundamental fact. Therefore the female position in the whole worldview is less and or nonexistence compared to the male.

This article is not about if Jesus existed or if Mary Magdalena existed, but what mythology manifested and how we view each sex because of the "story" that came down from this religion. We need to investigate all texts, viewpoints so that our mythology or attitudes toward the value of female and male qualities can be better understood.

If you do research on the Gospels that were recently found in the desert near the Nile River then you would know that their is evidence of Mary Magdelene being the "Beloved"disciple of Jesus. The city is near this area is Nag Hammadi and an Egyptian peasant found buried jars that contained ancient manuscripts. This all happened in 1945. These documents contained The Gospel of Thomas, Gospel of Philip, The Gospel of Mary Magdalene.

So what does this have to do with Mary and Jesus. The most controversial piece out of all these ancient gnosis (secret teachings) is that both Mary and Philip say things like why does Jesus kiss Mary on the mouth. Peter gets really mad and asks why Jesus speaks with Mary more than the others. When you begin to read the Gospel of Mary it is a lot more complex than the Gospels of John, Mark, Luke, Thomas, and Philip. The questions begin. Why did Mary anoint Jesus. How could a woman have the authority to anoint the possible son of god. Who was the one person that witnessed the resurrection? Mary. Now that bible researches now have these New-Ancient documents- it becomes clear that Mary was the only one evolved enough to see Jesus in his resurrected form.

The anointing of Jesus is not a Hebrew tradition- it is more Egyptian. Many believe that Jesus was part of a Jewish Mystic tradition that allowed women to study. The general Hebrew mainstream would not allow a woman to be any authority in the temple. We know Jesus advocated for the poor, the outcasts and probably allowed women to follow him. So if he found a woman who was well read, gifted in the art of dreaming and healing then why would he not teach her more. Since the beginning of time the Status Quo wants to keep the mainstream in their grasp. If they down play women, even give them a negative spin-like Mary is a prostitute- which never has been proven in the bible- then you are in the grasp of the powers that be. If you want to empower yourself and realize that women have always been near the fight, great leaders and powerful healers and mystics then do your research.

Mary was an advance soul who was a major part of Jesus' initiation into the mystical arts of the day- which still puts him at the top. That is to say he was the most evolved being to ever walk this earth- along with a couple others Buddha and Mary? Some say that Mary helped Jesus attain the ultimate act- to go beyond death. How did she help him- well that might be another story. People want to say that to be a Buddha and a Christ is not possible if a woman is involved. Christ did not arrive on Earth as the son of God- the whole missing years of Jesus- going to India, Tibet and the east to learn, meditate, fast, study, face his demons, and confront a feminine being to acknowledge that to be human is to embrace both masculine and feminine energy. To deny one or the other will weaken you as a human. The intitiation of Jesus required a female consort to introduce him to the female energy and go beyond this world or raise his consciousness level to realize the full potential of being human. It is not about denying our physcial attributes it is about embracing all parts of the human and going to the next level.

Sex is such a western Taboo- which is a small tragedy- or big one considering how we berate ourselves for enjoying it too much or whatever other hang ups we have about it.
Both Buddha and Jesus had to engage in spiritual sexual practices as part of their spiritual development. It is not about animal desire- but attaining female energy by being with a female. It is not about animalistic sexual relationships, but being a master of your entire breath, mind, body, and Kundalini. (In its hidden state, the kundalini is said to be sheer potentiality. This is only relatively correct, for the Goddess energy is always active on our behalf, maintaining all the subtle energetic processes that underlie our physical and mental structures and functions.)(Kundalini: Awakening the Serpent Powerby Georg Feuerstein)

http://bluenaturenetwork.com/DharmaMasterNanHuaichin/Samantabhadra4.jpg

It is so far beyond the western -"give me pleasure now" mode of existing that people get confused and fearful. They want sex to be a dirty thing and whatever else. It is part of procreation and if you are committed-even in your relationships and opening to higher states of consciousness. Even if you are married, with your partner-males, females- whatever combination twist you engage in- to commit yourself- to vow that you will love someone is a step in the right direction. Now using your body as a vehicle of the divine- yoga- sexual relations with RIGHT mind then there is another step to a higher level of being. Anyway you must do your own research on what this all leads to.

The Gospel of Mary shows that Mary Magdalena was not just the consort or lover to Jesus but a Disciple herself. She was not just one of the 12 Disciples but the "First Apostle." Her presence in Jesus' life was essential to his attainment of knowledge. It was a sexual love relationship. It was not like our marriages of today or any other time period to have exist so far. It was the ultimate human potential realized and embraced. Imagine two intitiates, well disciplined humans devoted to god, health, love and light, and then they consumated their love and devotion as humans. Is is so simple and powerful the result of two opposites making a whole. We live in the world of opposites and to brige this limited space and time, we must embrace our humanity and seek the other, but with discipline and knowledge. Because Jesus was marriage and had sexual relations with a female does not make him any less powerful, but shows us our highest human potential. This potential involves all aspects of being human, mostly the qualities we have not explored yet. Psychologist have already determined we have masculine qualities and feminine qualities and to deny one over the other is where we are now. To become whole we must not deny any of ourselves, and seek the hidden and dark areas to that we may move on in our evolution.